Latex: In Photo Essay Format

Latex.

Generally, that word brings condoms to mind. At least to me. I can’t speak for all you dirty darlings.

However, once the sexy Nicole of AdultSexToys.com sent me a super hot set of latex gloves and leggings – all my perceptions changed. The photo of the model looked fantastic – all slick and shiny and skin tight. Who wouldn’t want to jump me when they see me squeaking across the room in these things?

But of course we need to bear in mind that the sexiness that the Duchess would like to exude, and the dorkiness that she actually possesses sometimes creates painfully hilarious conflicts.

Now there are a few things to bear in mind when considering latex (Rubba) clothing.

1. It doesn’t generally arrive all slick and shiny like the photo. To get this effect, you’ll want to grab some “Rubba Glow” as well. It’s only $6.25 and really makes a big difference, as otherwise the product just looks kind of dull and almost…dusty.
2. It is not easy to get latex on. You’re going to want to powder yourself up, or maybe oil?
3. I don’t recommend this unless you are VERY confident in your body, and are relatively slim and hairless. Based on the challenges I had getting these products on, I wouldn’t reccommend it for the faint of heart either.

And now? A pictorial journey of the Duchess’s adventure with latex clothing:

So these are the gloves, and as you can see, I couldn’t get them on all the way. I have little wee hands, so clearly I just didn’t powder myself sufficiently.


Now for the leggings. Same difficulty as the gloves, so I really powdered myself. I was determined to make this work.

And?
Success!



I love those shoes. Except when I trip in public in them. That’s just embarassing.

Then came the task of getting the leggings off. I think that could be worked into foreplay right?
Cause I know my bff enjoyed herself when yanking those things off of me. I’m sure a date would too…


So what did I think of this overall?

I like the idea of latex. And they have a pretty good variety on the site
But it’s certainly something that you have to plan and prepare for. And it’s certainly not something that you would add to just “spice things up a bit” – this is another level past the “vanilla with a wee bit o’ chocolate.”

But despite my difficulties with it, I kind of liked them. I would love to be able to strut around in them for a hot seduction night. I don’t know about the teddies and what not though – I would definitely want to be 100% powdered and hairless and even thinner to try that.

Duchess rating: 2.5/5.

This sex toy review sponsored by Adult Sex Toys : over 8,000 sex toys and adult toys to choose from.

Gerard Butler and Little Black Panties

Has anyone seen this movie? I was relatively meh about it. Far too predictable for my taste, and the few funny moments didn’t outweigh the mediocrity of it.

However, it did have one semi-amusing scene that highlighted the sex toy that the darling Nicole of Adultsextoys.com sent me: the Berman Astrea Remote Control Vibrating Brief.

At first I was going to make a smart ass comment about her wearing black panties under a white dress- but then I realized that aside from it possibly just being a risque, fun thing to do – it was actually unintentional. So – moving on…

What did I think of this product?

Well first of all – let me say that there’s no way that the men at that table wouldn’t have heard the adult toy when it was on. It’s is loud. So I can’t really get on board with any advertising that implies that you can wear it out for some “subtle” or “discreet” stimulation. Not discreet by any stretch.

The panties themselves are relatively teeny – which is OK for some. And they’re stretchy too – the site says that they would be comfortable for up to a women’s size 10. I definitely wouldn’t wear these for comfort if you’re any larger than that. But who’s wearing them for that anyhow, right?

Here are the website deets for this sex toy:
Berman Astrea Remote Control Vibrating Brief Details:
Remote control vibrating brief provides discreet hands-free stimulation. Designed in beautiful stretch lace, comfortable and sexy. Mini-remote stimulator is contoured, compact, and removable. Remote control has a 12 foot range, and allows you to receive hands-free stimulation. Stretch lace is comfortable, machine-washable, and will fit up to a women’s size 10. Part of the Berman Center Intimate Accessories line. Products designed for women, by women to give you and your partner exactly what you need to optimize your sex life.
Category:Sexy Panties
For Body Part:Clitoris
Color:Black
Vibration:Hi-tech, Vibrates, Wireless

Price: $68.15

So what did I think of this adult toy? (Gotta love the instructions to use these phrases and links…that’s the last one, I promise!)

Well, as mentioned above- it’s loud, and the panties are not going to be something that I pull out unless I’m in a dire laundry emergency.

I also had to do quite a bit of adjusting to make the vibrator hit my clit in the right spot. And I certainly had to contort a bit and hold the position to make sure it stayed there. Once it was on, it was pretty nice though. Subtle, but still good.

The remote is more subtle than what you saw in the clip though. It’s small and black – not nearly as obnoxious as what they used in the film. It has one speed, and again – it’s relatively low intensity.

It does come with a delightful lavender coloured bag to hold it all, so it’s a pretty present if you’re so inclined to give it to a girlfriend.

But overall? Meh. Much like the movie – I experienced it once, and don’t really need to go back to it.

Duchess rating: 2 stars out of 5.

Why not check out Nicole on Twitter and Facebook? I’m sure she’d love to hear from you!
This sex toy review sponsored by Adult Sex Toys : over 8,000 sex toys and adult toys to choose from.

I’m a Sucker for Little Bows…


Normally I attempt to save lingerie reviews for HNT posts, but for some reason I was incapable of taking a photograph of myself in this chemise worth posting, so you get a stock shot of a model on a Saturday.

The darling Nancy of PinkCherry – one of my favourite sex toy suppliers sent me this darling little thing to strut around in. I do love Nancy – I want to take her out shopping and have indecent girly sleep-overs with her.

This adorable chemise is yet another from the Coquette line – they may be my new favourite outfitters. I have to confess, I do love the little blue bows. They add a nice splash of colour to the whole thing.

And this chemise? Super comfortable. You could actually sleep in this one with no problem at all – assuming that you don’t have an audience who insists on tearing it off of you. Personally, I would want to get down and dirty still wearing it – that’s the beauty of these things, isn’t it? You can keep it on and still provide easy access.

This is one of those “one-size” chemises, and for me it fit fine. But again, it’s mesh – so it won’t hide all your sins. And I would choose any cute little panties to wear beneath it judiciously, another pair of black mesh to match would probably be the way to go.

My only complaint about this is that I had a hard time sorting out the breast adjustment (ah the joys of being a woman…). It didn’t provide a lot of support, and while lack of coverage could be considered sexy, in this case I just found it to be a touch awkward.

I did love how it seemed to emphasize my ass though – the side slits and bows seemed placed just right for admiration of my legs and rear. I also think you would also do well wearing some lace stay-ups in this…

The chemise is ridiculously low-priced at $29.99, so I really see no reason to not buy it if you’re in the market while shopping around for your other adult toy needs.

Overall? Super comfy, cute and shows off all the right things.
Duchess rating: 4 out of 5 stars.

Duchess Debbie


So the delicious Nicole of the Sex Toy site Adultsextoys.com said she would send me some fantastic presents for my birthday, and on Friday, they all arrived.

As those of you who are friends with me on Facebook know (and if you’re not friends with me – why not??) I spent my Friday evening with the seductively fantastic Ms. Bambi Woods – AKA “Debbie” of Debbie Does Dallas fame.

It struck me as crazy that I host an erotica blog, and do sex toy reviews, but had never seen this classic artifact of cinematic history. I mean it’s Debbie. And she did Dallas. Although, in point of fact she doesn’t. She doesn’t actually make it to Dallas in the film – although it’s implied…

I actually found this film to be surprisingly refreshing. Porn movies to me are associated with a few formulaic factors: bad music, unrealistically tight/hairless/uplifted women and essentially no storyline.

Debbie Does Dallas actually was different than that. This movie did in fact have a plot. It wasn’t a complex plot by any means, but there was a storyline, and mild character development.

The plot? Debbie wins some sort of cheerleading competition and has to raise the money to get to Dallas to attend. The rest of her squad decides to raise money themselves to accompany her. They find making money to be a challenge, so they begin to sell themselves.

What pleasantly astonished me was the bodies shown in the film. These were real women’s bodies. Their breasts moved and were shaped and sized like women’s breasts actually do and are. They showed (OMG!) pubic hair! And the make-up? Like real women wear. It was simultaneously fascinating and grotesque. It’s been so long (if ever) that I’ve seen women look like that on film that I was positively riveted to the screen.

Another interesting aspect of this, dare I say, old-fashioned way of filming a porn were the camera angles. Now I’m no cinematographer, but I know it’s just not the way we do things anymore. They would choose an angle – often a very close up shot of a cock sliding in and out of a vagina and leave it there. This would go on for a few minutes. There was no possible way this was being faked let me tell you.

However, I will say – there is something to be said for how we do it now. It’s mildly arousing to see a thrusting member, but to me, it’s more stimulating to see some facial expressions to go along with it. To be in the moment with the couple. To just see genitals is a bit less personal and a touch harder to lose yourself in the fantasy.

But overall? I have to say I’m really glad I got this. I expected it to just be really cheesy and laughable, but it was definitely more than that. Debbie herself was really beautiful, and it was refreshing to see some real women.

One thing that did strike me about this film, is a seeming preoccupation with semen. I mean those girls really milked those guys dry, and left not a drop unlicked…Makes me wonder if my men have been feeling neglected in that area…

Now, was it a bit disturbing to see supposedly 16 year-old girls in the kind of situation that would now get most of the characters in the movie arrested? A little bit. I had to shake it off once or twice. I have heard that they re-did the film, and I do hope that they made them college cheerleaders instead.

But aside from that – I can certainly say that this film is better than a lot of what I’ve seen much more recently. Most porn movies are just a series of vignettes showing increasingly kinky scenarios. This, although definitely 70’s, was a cut above that. Worth checking out for sure. I would recommend adding it to your personal collection without reservation.

Special thanks to Nicole – truly a goddess of the adult toy world for sending me so many fun presents! And if you’re interested in finding out about Nicole’s adult toy giveaways and deals, she told me to give a shout out to their twitter and facebook pages. And since she’s lovely, why wouldn’t I do that for her?

Duchess’s rating: 4/5 O’s.

Twinkle and Slick

This is an entirely overdue post, and I would like to thank the kind folks over at Durex for their patience with me. Did you know they offered more than just condoms? Me neither!

They were kind enough to send me a few samples from their pick & licks line as well as a “Twinkle.” Sadly, at the time I had someone all lined up to try them out on – but that fell through, and so I’m giving a bit more of a theoretical promotion/review instead.

First of all: the Twinkle
A cock ring that vibrates for up to 20 minutes. How fun is that?! Can be worn with a condom, can be turned off and on. Kind of cool.

I imagine this is the sort of thing that can be enjoyed either alone, or with a partner. Not having a cock myself, I’m afraid I wouldn’t know. Hmmm…perhaps one could slip it onto a dildo and use it? Must try that…
Or even better, maybe I should offer to ship it off to one of my lovely readers in my contest from my last post

Then the fun came! They sent me a whole menu of items to choose from in their “pick & licks” line. A range of flavoured & textured & different sized condoms, as well as some lubes and massage oils. It was just like Christmas!

So I chose a range of each type of thing, and settled on a strawberry flavour. The flavour options were positively delicious: cherry, pina colada, orange, banana, strawberry and apple.

Now what to do with condoms when one is briefly sans partner? Well, this assignment of course forced me to use my imagination. I practiced my technique of putting a condom on a cock with my mouth on a variety of toys. Oh, and once those toys were properly sheathed? Well who needs lube? Off I went for some vibrating fun!

Now I do still have some condoms left over – so all I need now is someone to take advantage of them with me. Any takers?

Em & Lo and Being a Sexpert

Sex: How to Do Everything!

Several weeks ago I was asked if I would be interested in checking out this DVD series and talking about it a bit. I’m always up for a bit of education, so I agreed to give it a try. I expected something along the lines of what I’ve reviewed before in the Nina Hartley series and was pleasantly surprised with what I received.

This series was originally shown on British television and shows the “relationship experts” Em & Lo doing a series on Sex. (I confess, I’ve never heard of them, but they were fun. I want to spend a day shopping, dancing and having a slumber party with them now).

There are 10 episodes on 3 DVDs featuring a range of “how to’s”

Below is a mini clip of a bit of episode one on oral. This woman showing the girls techniques is le fab. She instructed them on how to do this sassy little crawl/slink up the victim man straddle him and put a condom on him with your mouth. You bet your ass I’m going to practice that one on my vibes/dildos until I’m expert at it. It was totally hot and mesmerizing.

Each episode covers a range of techniques, interviews, a fun “confession booth” bit and roving reporters who try out a range of toys and workshops etc and give honest feedback. It’s actually a really well-rounded and fascinating series. But the best part? It’s fun and light. It doesn’t get preachy or heavy, nor does it get too “sexy” or unrealistic. It’s just real people talking about all aspects of sex.

One thing I learned? Apparently it is possible for men to give themselves blow jobs. Until they actually showed a real live guy doing it, I never would have believed anyone could be that flexible. Take up some yoga guys – you CAN do it!

Here’s a run down of the episodes:

1. Oral
2. Manual
3. Orgasm
4. Sex Toys
5. Intercourse
6. Kinky
7. Fantasy
8. Anal
9. Seduction
10. Best of

There was an awesome section that showed an artist who does vagina casting. I was amazed at the range and beauty of them all. I have to confess, though I’ve even been to “The Vagina Monologues” I’ve never really thought about them that way. They truly are all unique and it’s a fascinating project.

I would definitely say that this is worth the investment if you’re curious about any aspect of sexuality. For the sake of getting this review done expeditiously (it’s already been weeks!) I confess I haven’t seen every episode yet. But this is one that I definitely want to finish – it’s really been a great ride.
Duchess Rating: 4 stars.
If you’re interested in picking it up, it’s $35.98 and you can click on the image above.


Yeah, that’s not me.
In case you haven’t figured it out – I’m a brunette.

This is me:

See? Brunette.

Have I ever mentioned how I am in pink fluffy heart girl crush with Nancy at PinkCherry.ca? (Oh yeah, there’s a .com version for all you non-Canadians too). Nancy sent me this slinky little chemise to model for you all. So, that means you get both a review AND a HNT from me all at once! How lucky are you?

I would love to have someone ripping this off of me right now. It’s been…a while. Or at the very least, to feel some hot probing fingers reaching up under the skirt, caressing my thighs…rubbing my clit…fucking me with his hands…yanking it up to my waist and thrusting into me…

Because this? Is not meant for a sedate evening drinking tea and toddling off to bed alone. This? Is hot. And clingy. And translucent and revealing.
A girl wears this when she’s looking to get some attention. Not when she’s at home alone for the night watching chick flicks. Maybe for watching porn and reading some erotica.

Not a lot of details to be included really – the picture says it all. The one thing I will point out is that she’s pulling that skirt out. It really is quite form fitting with just a hint of twirliness of th skirt, and definitely see-through. You will want to be selective when choosing (if any) which slutty little panties to wear under this. Definitely black and lacy is the way to go.

It has pretty little appliqu├ęs and (thank Goddess!) the front rhinestone bow thingy is a pin that’s removable. It’s made of nylon/lycra and the instructions indicate handwashing (which in my lazy world means that I toss it in a lingerie bag on delicate sans pin – but feel free to follow the instructions just in case…) The cost is $39.99 CDN or American.

I will say that I really like it. I’ve been sadly lacking in hot little chemises meant specifically to seduce in. This definitely fits the bill.

BUT – this does not hide your sins. Beware, this isn’t what you would wear to disguise what you might want…disguised. I found myself positioning myself carefully when posing in the mirror, and deciding that I still had a few more pounds to go before I would be strutting in front of my french doors for the neighbours. (Or possibly after a few glasses of wine when I just know that I’m actually a supermodel – whichever comes first).

Duchess’s rating: 3.5 stars.