Vignettes V

– So Bunny Ears and I seem to have petered off. We’ve had a few texts here and there, and mentioned getting together over the holidays, but it never happened. He’s a bit too much hassle anyways, I mean I’ve had less difficulty scheduling appointments with local dignitaries than getting together with him. I’m choosing to not let it affect my ego.

– My brother mentioned to me a few of his difficulties with his girlfriend the other day. I could cheerfully have gone my whole life without knowing how conservative he is sexually, and knowing what she was trying to initiate with him. Awkward.

– I took down my profile from one site the other day. I was a bit put off by some of the messages I was getting. However I forgot that I had a profile on another site, and suddenly I seem to be getting a lot of attention over there. It’s a whole different crowd at the other site, so maybe I’ll hang there for a while.

– I haven’t met Link yet, it seems like he has joint custody of his children, so getting together with him is quite legitimately challenging. He’s quite sweet, so I’m content to be patient.

– I did get a couple of emails re: my post below- I would love to see some more!

A Potential Second Suitor…

So I’m thinking about meeting someone new this weekend. As I’ve mentioned, I haven’t quite sorted out the Administrative details of all this in my head.

I’m not sure how I feel about having more than one partner going on at the same time (please note, I do not mean simultaneously :P) This is not for any moralistic reason- more just for safety/health etc.

However, as much as I adore Bunny Ears, I’ve meet him twice in a month and a half and getting together with him is quite honestly a pain in the ass. I mean we’re both single, and scheduling a time to get together? Much more effort than it’s worth. Especially since it’s not like we need to spend more than a couple of hours together.

So, I’m thinking about meeting #2 this weekend. Let’s call him “Link.” (Due to a combination of reasons involving his profile name). Link is the one who said that it was cool if I wasn’t interested, and that I should write erotica.

We’ve exchanged a few naughty emails, and he’s quite a good writer himself. Very detailed. Perhaps I’ll post some of it on here soon.

The one thing that I find hilarious though is that he comments on my writing in a rather specific way. He told me that in one part I gave a “good visual.” I am dying to know if he’s an English teacher of some sort.

I am still apprehensive about these meetings though. Generally on a date I worry about things like whether or not they’ll find me cute/interesting/intelligent.

On these “dates” I’m more concerned about whether or not there’s an attraction, but even more importantly- how these men are feeling about these kinds of meetings. I.e are they going to be misogynistic assholes who are going to act like I’m a whore because of how we met? Now being treated like whore in the bedroom = good. Being treated like whore out in public because I’m owning my sexuality= not good and potentially scary.

But, the initial meeting must be done, and I have to remind myself that I am in control. And I have the choice to stay or go or decide to take things further.

So far, Link has been as gentlemanly as I would like, as well as naughty as I would like too.

Hopefully with time, I’ll get the hang of all this…

Vignettes IV

I got the sweetest message from one of my potential suitors tonight. He said it was cool that I wasn’t interested in him (to be honest, I can barely keep up with them all – I don’t know if I was ever interested or not) but that I should write erotica. Nice to know that some of them on there have some class. Makes me think that I should give that guy a chance if he’s going to be such a sweetheart about it.

I’m still trying to sort out the Administrative details of all this. Take Bunny Ears for example. I saw him Friday night. Does it equate to needy if I get all texty and tell him I would love to see him again? Is there some sort of 3 day rule with this kind of thing? Cause yeah, it’s been 5 days…I would really love to see him…

For the girls: do you find it to be just a wee bit of a pain in the ass how much grooming you have to do in preparation? Men: what do you do to prep for us?

I know I’ve mentioned this before, but I find it hilarious how sexualized everything has become now. Glimpses of photos in the paper immediately look dirty until I examine them more closely and see how innocuous they really are. I get turned on and wet bu just a stray thought now. Sexuality really is a muscle..and the more you work it…

I was asked in my last post where Bunny Ears got his nickname. It came as a result of one of the photos he sent me.

73 year old man sent me another message. Ack! No! I don’t want to be rude, but just…no!

One of my email suitors from this blog sent me a photo. He’s quite adorable- unfortunately, he lives in another country. Yes it’s the country next door and all- but still…M- offer to fly me down and I’ll consider it!

Variety is the Spice Of Life…

So, as mentioned Bunny Ears came over last night. He told me to be wearing something “trashy.” I went for more cliché than anything. The stockings and shoes in my profile pic, a lacy camisole and panties, a loosely ties short robe over it and a long string of pearls. Too much? Maybe, but it was fun playing dress-up…

I do enjoy a man who gets right to the point too. I barely got a “hello” out before I had hands and tongue all over me. The couch portion of the evening lasted about 2 minutes before I led him to the bedroom. I did however, force him to admire the ensemble I had put together for myself. He didn’t seem to care. The boy needs to learn to appreciate aesthetics more.

There was a very brief making out period before he decided that his tongue could be put to much better use elsewhere. He seems to be one of the men who actually mean it when he says he loves oral sex. Both giving and receiving.

He does like variety. A very thorough oral sex session for me, a little 69 action, followed by me riding him, then him on top of me, then me going down on him, then him going down on me, then a bit more of me on top, a bit more of me down on him…I think you get the idea….

All in all, I would have to say that all of the basics were covered. By the time it was all over, I was shocked that he could last an hour that way…

I even expressed a bit of concern that I just wasn’t doing my job properly, but he assured me otherwise. He simply seems to have full control of himself and can make it last and last…an excellent quality in a man.

I am completely sore all over today and would kill for a massage. But based on the reasons why? Well, I’m certainly not complaining…

Vignettes 3

So it’s been a few days- I apologise for inadvertently keeping you all in suspense. In response to Misstress M– unfortunately life got in the way and I didn’t end up managing to see Bunny Ears this past weekend. Damn reality getting in the way of fantasy.

The photo above? That’s the little box o’ fun that I keep beside my bed. A bit of erotica. A couple vibrators. Condoms. Nothing too exotic (yet).

So as a result of this little blog that is today celebrating it’s one month birthday- I have received a couple of emails this week. One from S in Vancouver, and one from M in Los Angeles. Welcome to the party gentlemen. I would love to meet each of you, it’s too bad that you’re not a bit closer to home. Perhaps we could meet somewhere in the middle?

So I sent Bunny rears a few suggestive texts this week. Just making sure he doesn’t start neglecting me. It resulted in the offer of a nooner, then asking what time I got off work, then wanting to come over late that evening. Then when I texted back that night, telling him all the things I was doing to make up for the fact that he wasn’t there, he offered to come right over. Too bad I had such a crazy work week- I almost let him come that night. In retrospect I kind of wish I had…Our bloody schedules are just not meshing at all…

Ok my sexy darlings, off to carry on with the whirlwind that is my life right now. I would kill for a few days off just to breathe….

The Duchess’s Desires…

I am a sweet girl. Sometimes to the point of giving one a toothache. And I’m generally kind, considerate and understanding. What do all of these lovely adjectives result in? Everyone else getting what they want, and the Duchess simply accepting.

So tonight, I would like to put it out there to the universe. I want to say exactly what I want. Perhaps this will give me the power and confidence to expect it, and take it.

I have a date with Bunny Ears on Saturday. I want him to greet me at the door in scarcely more than a towel. I want him to feel his impatience as I take off my jacket and shoes. I want him to pin me against the wall, undo my jeans and slide his fingers into my pussy. I want to feel his teeth on my earlobes and his tongue running down my neck. I want him to pull down my panties pull my leg up over his hip and thrust his cock into me hard and deep. I want it fast and rough and impatient.

Then we can move to the bedroom….

I want a partner who shows me that he wants me with every look, touch and word. I want to know that I can have him at any time. I want a man who will wake me up in the middle of the night with his tongue on my clit. I want a man who will tie me up and blindfold me and make me scream in lust and beg for more. I want a man who is willing to lick chocolate off my breasts and honey off my cunt. I want a man who can talk dirty to me without sounding ridiculous. I want someone who will come to a lingerie store with me, make me model everything, fuck me in the change room and pick up the bill.

Is that all? Not even remotely…but it might be enough to ask for tonight.

What do YOU want?

Sex Shouldn’t Have So Many Logistical Considerations…

So I now need to establish some guidelines for myself.

I have stated that I am not interested in hooking up with men that are otherwise spoken for.
Now this is not out of consideration for the other woman. I’ve been cheated on. But I did not blame the girl. I blamed the person who was in the relationship – i.e. my boyfriend at the time. I can’t understand people who go all psycho on the person who isn’t with YOU. Now that being said, if the person is your sister or BFF- well that’s a different story. But I digress.

At the moment I am shying away from attached men. That may change, but for now, that’s one of my ultra-loose rules.

So I’ve had sex with Bunny Ears. He is now away for the weekend. Now I by no means think that we owe each other any degree of loyalty or exclusivity. And if I were to find that he had sex while away, I wouldn’t care at all.

But that being said, where is the line? First of all, there’s of course the safety issue. Multiple partners equates to increased risk.

Oddly, when I was still considering Adonis (common-law) (that seems to have petered off, and unless something dramatic happens, I imagine this will be the last you hear of him) he was quite insistent about exclusivity. He didn’t want either of us to be having sex with several people. Did he have the right to ask that? Maybe. Did I have to comply? My choice. I hadn’t put a great deal of thought into it since I wasn’t serious about getting together with him anyhow.

But now what? All issues of “risk” aside, I need to make some sort of decision. Am I willing to have sex with several people? (Perhaps not simultaeously) or am I committed to one partner at a time.

Since these are not “relationships” that I’m looking for, there are no cut and dry rules about “breaking up.” Perhaps Bunny Ears and I never have sex again. Perhaps it was one time only (not likely, since he really wanted to get together before he went away, but circumstances prevented…)

And really, how personal is too personal? Can I ASK Bunny Ears if we’re supposed to be exclusive? Ask him to let me know if he decides that we’re not having sex anymore? Whoa. That sounds WAYYYYY too relationship-ish to me. And needy. And creepy.

So, maybe I decide that I’ll have as many partners as I want. And there’s the crux. My worry is about my own little sense of self-worth. I want this to be a FUN experiment. I want no judgement from people. Nor do I want to start feeling badly about myself. Nor do I want to keep entire segments of my life a secret from everyone.

There seems to be a bit more administrative/logistical thought involved in this than expected.

Thoughts anyone? How do YOU handle it (if you’re in a similar situation)??

Bullet Bitten…

So when I started this social experiment, I fully expected that I would bail on it quickly. I would get turned off by the lack of romance. Or I would simply not have the guts to actually meet anyone.
Getting offers didn’t seem to be the problem. It was my own follow-through that I doubted.

But today? Sunday afternoon? I met Bunny ears. I had a bit of a dilemma about how the actual meeting should go. It seemed the height of stupidity to simply go to his place before we had ever actually spoken on the phone….

Starbucks it was. I watched him drink a latté and suggested we go for a walk. The whole time we were talking, I found myself wanting to lean over and kiss him. That seemed like a promising start…We were very close to his place, and I didn’t realize that I led us right to his building until he pointed it out. As it seemed a sign from the Gods, I agreed that we should go in.

Honestly? I didn’t know if I would be following through with this or not. I was willing to make out with him and maybe a bit more, but I wasn’t convinced that I would go any further than heavy petting.

But you know how these things go…

I was actually surprised at how it went all things considered. He was sweeter than I expected him to be, not shy, but completely respectful.

He started out pretty traditionally, making out on the couch. Initially there was some porn on in the background, but it seemed a bit too cliché, so I had him switch it to “Footloose.” (Hey, it’s classic for a reason).

He actually didn’t try much more than kissing for a little while. He seemed content to do his thing, and follow my lead as I was more and more willing to shed clothes and let my hands wander. After we were both top naked and obviously about to lose the rest, I suggested we move to the bedroom and that’s where he got a lot more aggressive.

The second we walked in, I turned around and he had nothing on. I followed suit and without hesitation his tongue was between my legs. I have my moods with this – sometimes you can go down on me for hours. Other times, it’s too intense, and I’d rather have his cock inside me. Today was one of those days, but Bunny Ears wasn’t particularly interested in this request/ demand/plea…he just kept right on going…

It was only after some more writhing and telling him how much I wanted him to fuck me that he graciously indulged me. I was a bit apprehensive as he was hard and dripping as he was sucking on my clit. I was reluctant to manipulate him too much, for fear of it being over too quickly.

I didn’t need to worry about that. My other fear was about his size…talk about girth….
He penetrated me like a champion though…and soon had me gasping and moaning….

I came before he did, and was happy to see that he wasn’t one of those people who just never cum at all. A few minutes of me sucking on his cock did the trick admirably.

I stayed for a little bit, drank more wine until I realized I hadn’t eaten anything today and was getting tipsy, then he walked me to my car.

I have no idea what the rules are surrounding these sorts of encounters, but just thinking about him now gets me wet all over again. Now that the initial meeting is over, I would definitely be open to seeing him again and again and again….

Sometime I’ll Need to Just Bite the Bullet and Do This Thing

So a side-effect of this experience is the hyper sensitivity to all things of a sexual nature. I have never masturbated and used my vibrator so much in such a short period of time.

I am finding myself in a constant state of arousal. I guess like all things, sexuality is a muscle, and the more you use it – the more easily stimulated and available it is.

I am just about jumping out of my skin right now, wanting someone to take the edge off.

I talked to Bunny Ears the past couple of days. He’s one of the few who have sent me nude photos. I don’t mind the photos, but again, I get the sense that the men are trying to simply show off their size. Ample endowment is not a guarantee that they can get me off.

Bunny Ears was asking me to meet him for a drink last night. He seems OK with the idea that we meet once or twice, and then go from there. I can respect that kind of attitude a lot more than the men who simply want to meet me for sex simply after reading my profile.

I was so aroused last night that I thought about actually putting myself together and meeting him in a hotel bar. If things went well we could get a room right there.

Then I started coughing. Oh yeah. That’s why I was staying home all weekend. Somehow I don’t think coughing fits are what I should make my trademark “thing.” Hopefully next weekend I’ll be in a completely healthy state.

Although I confess I’m a bit terrified. I’m ready for sex. God knows I am. But still…meeting a complete stranger? Small talk? Not so much one of my strong points. What if we end up just staring at each other without anything to say? Perhaps I should just shove my tongue down his throat to make up for any awkward silences?

I suppose rubbing his crotch and leaning over to show off some cleavage might give me a few moments to come up with some sparking comment?

I guess everyone has fear of the first time right? And then with practice…?